Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
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Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
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I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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