how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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