I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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