i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Randomize
