I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
