Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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