He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
