Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
