I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
