YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
