Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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