i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
