Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
People with herpes should wear stickers.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
We need a shit load of segways right now
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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