North Korea, Best Korea!
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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