I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize