You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
