You're my little dorito
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
