I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize