very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
