Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Can I color on your dick again?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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