I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
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