I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
We need to get me chipped asap
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
