i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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