please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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