I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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