Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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