it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
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so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
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I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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