Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
