And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
No subtext here. People are naked.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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