Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize
