I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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