Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
