So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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