so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
we're making bets on your personal life
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
