I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
