At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize