Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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