You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
My vagina just recognized that song.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize