Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
