Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
