what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
