Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
