Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
