Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
