i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
