we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
