Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize