is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
