I think I am morally bankrupt
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
as a side note pls kill me
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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