is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
don't judge my taste in strippers
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize