How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize