You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I lost the right to judge tonight
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
