At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
