marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
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so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
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I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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