kristin has been a bad kristin
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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